The Quesadilla That Changed My Mind About The Bailout

I kid you not, readers, he literally uttered the word “Citigroup” and his quesadilla was packed in a bag with plastic utensils and napkins, and he was out the door. No one asked him for ID or made a note anywhere of what he was eating that day. He just said “Citigroup” and bounced. I was on line to pay behind him with my own chicken quesadilla and a bottle of Diet Pepsi…cost to me as a non-Citigroup employee: $9.85 plus tax.

CNBC's Most Annoying Commercials

I don’t know if it’s the advertisers who produce the commercial or CNBC who runs them ad nauseumthat I blame, but below is my list of the most obnoxious, annoying and pointless commercials on CNBC. Please put them out of our misery, Network Brass.

Forget Chuck Norris: Here are the Harry Markopolos Facts

The spotlight on Harry Markopolos, the whistleblower who was ignored regarding the Madoff fraud, is about to shine as brightly as a supernova. As the gushing press and blogosphere begin their lionization of the brilliant and intrepid math whiz who saw through the deception, I thought it might be a good time to assemble a list of the following little-known “facts” from around the Internet about the man who could have been a hero.

Consolidate Your Brokerage Accounts in 2009: Your Friend, the ACAT

Consolidating your brokerage accounts isn’t the same thing as “putting all your eggs in one basket”.  Rather, it’s about keeping a wide variety of different investments with only a few trustworthy and helpful people so you can keep track of what you’re doing.  Putting all your eggs in one basket would be consolidating your whole…

Hot Links

Hot Links for Weekend Reading: As Dealbreaker clearly owns the Madoff Story, here is the best of their (relentless) coverage over the past week: Check out the post about the Bernard Madoff Securities promotional item that is a must have if there are any left on Ebay:  The Madoff Emergency Response Kit! Can’t make that…

Test Your Broker: Call Him Before 8:30 AM

As a broker AND a branch manager, I am consistently amazed at how difficult it is to explain the importance of starting the day early to other reps.  The conversation goes something like this: Branch Manager:  Where are you, the market is opening in 20 minutes… Broker:  Yeah, I know, had to take care of a…

Give the Black Swan a Rest for 2009; The Search for a New Metaphor

With the fresh start we’ve been given, if only by the calendar, I’m here to say that enough is enough – let’s put the over-referenced, tired Black Swan trope into retirement. Just in case we get another year of absurdity and hyperbolic surprise, I’ve come up with a few equally improbable animal variations that could take it’s place for 2009

Interview with Johnny Upside: Fund of Fund of Funds

Today we bring you an interview with Johnny Upside, a Wall Street hotshot armed with an MBA, very little brain power and a limitless ego and sense of entitlement.  Johnny possesses only one real talent – the ability to show up wherever the big money is being made.  Unfortunately, his very presence usually means that…

Barron's Buzz: January 4th, 2009

Quick thoughts on this week’s Barron’s… Bubble in Treasuries?  Yeah, probably…Read the cover article, called Get Out Now by Andrew Bary and you decide. Kopin Tan does the obligatory “cash on the sidelines about to come into the market” story in The Trader column.  I’ll admit, the figures are huge, but they’ve always seemed huge,…