Here we are again, sweating through the dog days of another brutal summer on the molten blacktop streets of NYC. And as usual, not all of this city’s male inhabitants are playing the game correctly. Hence, the Public Service Announcement I find myself compelled to deliver below:
Attention, Men of New York:
Starting today and for every day after this one unto the Rapture, there will be no more open-toed shoes in Manhattan unless you’re on your very own balcony or a roofdeck somewhere, far from my gaze.
I’m all for a pair of flip flops at the beach or on vacay.
But sandals on the subway? You f***ing serious? Mandals? Gross!
Watching your toes slime their way through the Times Square subway station and its two inches-high layer of gelatinous grime is without question the lowlight of my day. Anyone doing that doesn’t deserve to even have a pair of feet, they should be confiscated and replaced with canvas sacks of sand for you to walk on.
And dude, if you’re not taking care of your toes, feel free not to advertise it with flip flops.
Let me tell you something, Cabron: The first things women notice when they look at a man are his hands and feet. They can’t help it and don’t even realize that they do it, this is basic biology operating at the subconscious level, a survival thing. Back before we were consumers and restaurant patrons and sex addicts and chiropractors, we were animals. Beavers and boars. And the female beavers and boars needed to see strong, capable hands and feet prior to mating and having their babies with a male. “Yes, fine, he’s a Presbyterian and my mother likes him – but can he build a damn? Can he wrestle an intruding platypus to the ground if our nest is threatened?”
And to this day, women will notice your feet and hands before anything else, even if it doesn’t register with them. Why do you think we have to wear wedding bands around our fingers as opposed to a necklace or bracelet? It’s a territorial thing, fellas, women instinctively know where other women are going to look. By not taking care of your hands and feet (with clean, short nails), you are de facto removing yourself from the possibility of any kind of female interest, so put your hairy toes away – especially if I have to share a lunch counter with you, dirtbag.
And just one more thing – I don’t care what GQ is telling us this month, under NO circumstances are you to start dressing up like Indiana Jones.
![gq](http://thereformedbroker.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/gq.png)
Oh, and last thing, I promise – Madras pants or seersucker ANYTHING are both punishable by death, effective immediately. Got that, Gatsby?
Okay, PSA over, let’s all go back to business in appropriate footwear.
Ganadora viral
[…]always a large fan of linking to bloggers that I really like but do not get a whole lot of link enjoy from[…]
how to hack someone
[…]very few websites that transpire to become in depth beneath, from our point of view are undoubtedly well really worth checking out[…]
ผ้าญี่ปุ่นสำเพ็ง
????????????? ??????????????????? ????????????? ?????????????????????????????????????
piala dunia 2018
[…]Sites of interest we’ve a link to[…]
Coyote brown army boots
[…]Every when in a while we pick out blogs that we study. Listed below would be the latest sites that we pick […]
Amanda Hawkins
[…]here are some hyperlinks to web-sites that we link to for the reason that we believe they are really worth visiting[…]
Anal Sex Beads
[…]below you will discover the link to some websites that we consider you’ll want to visit[…]
power bullet vibrator
[…]please take a look at the sites we adhere to, such as this 1, as it represents our picks through the web[…]
Kegel Balls
[…]although web sites we backlink to beneath are considerably not associated to ours, we feel they are in fact worth a go by way of, so possess a look[…]
Aluminum carabiner
[…]here are some hyperlinks to web sites that we link to mainly because we believe they are really worth visiting[…]
هایکویژن
Admiring the commitment you set into your site and in depth info you provide. It is awesome to appear across a site every single once in a whilst that isn’t the same old rehashed details. Fantastic read! I’ve bookmarked your website and I’m incorporati…
100% kona coffee
100% Kona Coffee Beans fancy roasted by LION have been enjoyed by coffee aficionados for well over 100 years.
Afghanistan blog
[…]check below, are some totally unrelated internet websites to ours, nonetheless, they’re most trustworthy sources that we use[…]
projection dome tent
[…]one of our guests just lately proposed the following website[…]
eDiscovery Compliance Solution
[…]check beneath, are some entirely unrelated websites to ours, nonetheless, they are most trustworthy sources that we use[…]