This is hilarious. And in truth, merely an extrapolation of the Boskin Commission’s masterpiece of cost obfuscation in the 70’s.
There is discussion afoot about coming up with an alternate measure of inflation. Ya know, one without all this pesky inflation in it. Mr Juggles comes out of nowhere and drops an instant classic, Long or Short Capital‘s suggestion below:
This new CPI, CPI-F (flat), will provide data on all changes in the prices paid by urban consumers for a representative basket of goods and services whose prices did not vary that month. We expect it to have the most consistent and consistently low inflation readings of all the CPI measures. Its current reading is 1.5%. In the future, the monthly CPI-F level will be reported on the 5th of the following month, unless there is no change to the index, in which case you can continue to use the prior month’s reading. A chart of the CPI-F since 1900 is included here for your education.
LOL, inflation ex-inflation. Gangsta.