Dear MSNBC,

Dear MSNBC,

Just a quick wake up call before you go suspending any other personnel for making political contributions:

WE DON’T CARE.  NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT.  WE DON’T TRUST ANY OF YOUR ON-AIR PERSONALITIES ANYWAY.  NOR DO WE CONSIDER ANYONE IN THE MEDIA TO BE UNBIASED.

BECAUSE WE ARE GROWNUPS AND KNOW THAT THERE IS NO SUCH THING.

If Joe Scarborough wants to give money to fascists and Keith Olbermann wants to pay for Fidel Castro’s medical bills and Rachel Maddow’s a closet Zapatista and Chris Matthews contributes to the Whigs it just doesn’t mean anything anymore.

There is no longer any actual “News” in this world.  There is only Opinion tarted up in the cheap perfume, fake pearls and fishnets of the supposedly straight-up 12 hour news cycle.  We get it.  And we’ve chosen to just live with it by picking our favorite brand (read: slant) of news and gleefully allowing it to confirm our pre-existing viewpoints.

So stop suspending people, the game is up and we know exactly what you are.  After all, we put you there.

Sincerely,

Americans with IQs over 100