Remember when the producers of Diff’rent Strokes decided that Arnold wasn’t cute enough anymore so they brought on the quintessential red-headed stepchild, Sam, to ratchet up the adorable factor? Gary Coleman probably felt a lot like Crude Oil feels now that Gold has replaced it as the commodity speculators’ darling. Anyway, let’s take a look…
Merrill Lynch
The Reformed Broker for Bank of America CEO
After much soul searching and consumption of Skittles over the weekend, I’ve decided to formally throw my hat in the ring for the position of Bank of America CEO. Frankly, folks, this is the easiest job in finance right now – akin to taking over an NFL franchise the year after it goes 0 and…
Dimon Loves Retail Stockbrokers
I caught this in the New York Post this morning, thought it was pretty cool: “I love the retail broker business because my dad is a broker and my grandfather was a broker and it was the first job I ever had,” Jamie Dimon, 53, said at a Securities Industry and Financial Markets Association meeting…
The Fearsome Foursome Hits the Links
Dear Kenny, Glad you could make it out with us today. Don’t worry about your scores on this round, you’ll have plenty of time to improve! CUL8R, Stan the Man
They Won't Have Ken Lewis To Kick Around Anymore
The big breaking news this evening is the resignation of Bank of America‘s embattled CEO Ken Lewis (damn, I’ve had to type the phrase “embattled CEO” a lot this year) which will take effect on January 1st. There was plenty of speculation that this would happen as investigations into the Merrill acquisition scandal began to…
Merrill Lynch, Apparently, Committed Suicide
Thanks to my pal The Epicurean Dealmaker‘s incredible Supermassive Black Hole post, I learned a great deal more about why some investment banks survived the credit meltdown and others didn’t. My key takeaway from this must-read piece is that Merrill Lynch had a Death Wish. See that crazy-ass blue line really going for it through…
Ken Lewis: Should I Stay or Should I Go (reprise)
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYxkvAwIjzQ] With trouble coming from both the SEC and the NY Attorney General over the Merrill Lynch acquisition, Ken Lewis is faced with a big decision – should he stay or should he go as CEO of Bank of America? With apologies to the late Joe Strummer, here’s Kenny doing his rendition of The Clash‘s…
Lapping the Crisis Quarter Makes For Pretty Headlines
As I’ve just thoroughly enjoyed the opening weekend games of the NFL, I thought I’d start with a football analogy to make my case. Here is a bizarre but true factoid that exemplifies the drawing of flawed conclusions based purely on logic: If the Detroit Lions win a single game in the 2009 season, their…
Breakfast Links: Housing Bottoms, Car Wars & Pigs in the Hamptons
Stuff I’m Reading this Morning… Major firm strategists move around their year-end S&P 500 targets, as if anyone cares what they think anymore. (BIG) I agree with this one, farewell Geneva asset management biz…do some actual work. (Minyanville) Bank failures accelerating. (TBP) Ezra Klein on the new Menu Labeling trend. (WaPo) Henry Blodget explains the…
Taibbi v Goldman Redux
“Goldman Sachs…is like a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money” Matt Taibbi, Rolling Stone Magazine Matt Taibbi is the reporter who has just exploded into the public consciousness with his brutal Goldman Sachs Controls the Universe piece in, of all places, Rolling Stone…
