Thirty Signs You’re On Financial Twitter

Thirty Signs You’re On Financial Twitter

30. You unintentionally know more about Greece than you had ever thought possible

29. Joe Weisenthal is your alarm clock 

28. You wish David Tepper, Bill Ackman, Michael Lewis and Retired Bernanke would show up here already and engage

27. You watch a guy switch his avatar to a pic of a hot girl and 5000 traders follow him overnight

26. “How the f**k does Paul Kedrosky have 290,000 followers? His entire feed is weather maps from the 1400’s!”

25. You know its five o’clock when the Gartman subtweeting gets underway

24. You’re amazed at how bad most big financial services companies are at this, after so much time

23. You’ll retweet Eddy Elfenbein‘s jokes but only favorite Ivan the K. What’s up with that?

22. You don’t understand why StockTwits hasn’t been bought out yet 

21. You wish you could auto-filter the following terms: “Taibbi” “Piketty” “Apple is bigger than” “Bubble” “Rickards” “Dudley” Rig count” “Ello” “Correlation” “Lagarde” “China” “Flash PMI” “Seasonality” “Forward guidance” “CAPE Ratio” “Crash” “Meredith Whitney”

20. You will unfollow anyone who tweets links to registration-walled content – life’s too short

19. You’ve had to ask whether or not the Cramer’s Shirt, David Faber’s Hair and Mandy’s Mounds accounts are linked (they aren’t)

18. Non Farm Payrolls day is your Oscars, but we get the Oscars 12 times a year!

17. You know that in the hierarchy of thirstiness (and we’re all thirsty), the people with pictures of themselves on TV as their avatars are the very thirstiest

16. You’ve had a skirmish or two with Charlie Gasparino, fortunately in a digital setting and not outside a bar

15. Mark Cuban is the man, you are reminded, because he mixes it up with all comers and never pulls rank in lieu of answering a disagreement

14. You wish Ralph Acampora would stop making intraday directional calls in real-time. You wish Doug Kass got as much respect online as he does in real life

13. Sometimes, when you’re following a tweet war over how many basis points someone’s service model costs, you wonder what it’s all about. Life, I mean.

12. That fund manager who bought himself tens of thousands of followers instead of earning them makes you sick

11. You love the Wu-Tang Finance feed

10. You’ve been caught in a canoe fight with either Cullen Roche or Noah Smith or both at once

9. You’ve learned to unfollow and then refollow Marc Andreessen when you see a tweet starting with 1/76

8. You get confused between all the Matts (Levine, Phillips, Zeitlin, Boesler, Goldstein, Klein, Yglesias, etc)

7. You have whatshisname muted but every once in a while you log out just to see if he’s still a massive tool. Yup, he is.

6. You despise lists of financial tweeters. Unless you’re on them, in which case you RT them for a week

5. You’ve lost track of who Dan Gross writes for but always click his links

4. You’re afraid for whomever pissed off Skirt in real life today

3. You want to say something to Ritholtz about the ALL CAPS thing but you don’t want to offend him

2. Every time you see that Warren Buffett has only tweeted six times but has 960,000 followers, it puts your own stats in (crushing) perspective

1. The only way you can read a whole chapter of a book is if your phone dies or is in the other room

 

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