Things To Do Instead Of Attending Your Neighbor's Tea Party Rally

Tea Party
Tea Party

The Tea Party movement has been spared my ridicule thus far…Until now.

I caught a Fox News town hall-esque State of the Tea Party program hosted by Glenn Beck this weekend and my abdominal muscles ached from all the cringing this broadcast induced. This was a nationally-televised moron-a-thon in the round.

Its not that I am completely divorced from some of the views espoused by the nascent Tea Party phenomenon. Rather, its the embarrassment I feel for 95% of the participants that puts me off so acutely. Uneducated and easily swayed, most of them are simply being swept up in the most pathetic episode of faux-folksy, grassroots socio-political marketing abuse since the Ross Perot Scare of 20 years ago.

In an attempt to spare you the humiliation you are sure to feel in the near-future as a result of having been caught at one of these sh#tshows, I’ve put together a helpful list of alternate activities you can pursue rather than carrying a misspelled sign in a parade of fools who aren’t smart enough to know when they’re in a discussion that’s way over their heads.

Here are Things To Do Instead Of Attending Your Neighbor’s Tea Party Rally:

  • 1. Study up on previous periods of economic turmoil and formulate a plan to benefit from the unintended consequences of our current situation, which is entirely out of your control anyway, John Q. American Idol-watcher.
  • 2. Register for a Twitter account, pick an interesting avatar image, and try not to piss off Howard Lindzon or Ashton Kutcher by replying to their every digital sneeze…after all, Howard and Ashton are the King and Queen, respectively, of Twitter.
  • 3. Head to Home Depot for an SUV-full of wainscoting supplies. Pick up six or seven illegal migrant workers in the designated section of HD’s parking lot and do your part to stimulate the Mexican economy.
  • 4. Rent the season two DVD set of “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” to get yourself up to speed with the funniest show on television. Why not season 1? The show didn’t really come into it’s own until Danny DeVito became a full-time cast member.
  • 5. Stop getting your business news from USA Today and start reading the likes of John Mauldin and Richard Russell if you truly have an interest in understanding the economy.
  • 6. Take advantage of seasonality and go shopping for heavily-discounted Halloween costumes, Christmas lights and super-furry Ugg boots.
  • 7. Finish that novel you started last year about the coming-of-age of a conscientious young idealist, set in whatever era you actually came of age in (people will want to read about your childhood, really, they will).
  • 8. Attend a comic book convention if you truly must be in an environment where everyone around you is an expert on good-versus-evil.

I was going to go to ten, but stopped here as I realized that there are probably 50 million more worthwhile things you could do than get suckered into this pseudo-populist nonsense. When your neighbors or co-workers email you a link to one of these events, be sure to reach for this list of alternatives or start making your own.

Thanks for reading.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

This content, which contains security-related opinions and/or information, is provided for informational purposes only and should not be relied upon in any manner as professional advice, or an endorsement of any practices, products or services. There can be no guarantees or assurances that the views expressed here will be applicable for any particular facts or circumstances, and should not be relied upon in any manner. You should consult your own advisers as to legal, business, tax, and other related matters concerning any investment.

The commentary in this “post” (including any related blog, podcasts, videos, and social media) reflects the personal opinions, viewpoints, and analyses of the Ritholtz Wealth Management employees providing such comments, and should not be regarded the views of Ritholtz Wealth Management LLC. or its respective affiliates or as a description of advisory services provided by Ritholtz Wealth Management or performance returns of any Ritholtz Wealth Management Investments client.

References to any securities or digital assets, or performance data, are for illustrative purposes only and do not constitute an investment recommendation or offer to provide investment advisory services. Charts and graphs provided within are for informational purposes solely and should not be relied upon when making any investment decision. Past performance is not indicative of future results. The content speaks only as of the date indicated. Any projections, estimates, forecasts, targets, prospects, and/or opinions expressed in these materials are subject to change without notice and may differ or be contrary to opinions expressed by others.

Wealthcast Media, an affiliate of Ritholtz Wealth Management, receives payment from various entities for advertisements in affiliated podcasts, blogs and emails. Inclusion of such advertisements does not constitute or imply endorsement, sponsorship or recommendation thereof, or any affiliation therewith, by the Content Creator or by Ritholtz Wealth Management or any of its employees. Investments in securities involve the risk of loss. For additional advertisement disclaimers see here: https://www.ritholtzwealth.com/advertising-disclaimers

Please see disclosures here.

What's been said:

Discussions found on the web
  1. Things To Do Instead Of Attending Your Neighbor’s Tea Party Rally commented on May 04

    […] News Sources wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptTea Party The Tea Party movement has been spared my ridicule thus far…Until now. I caught a Fox News town hall-esque State of the Tea Party program hosted by Glenn Beck this weekend and my abdominal muscles ached from all the cringing this broadcast induced. This was a nationally-televised moron-a-thon in the round. Its not that I am completely divorced from some of the views espoused by the nascent Tea Party phenomenon. Rather, its the embarrassment I feel for 95% of the part […]

  2. Things To Do Instead Of Attending Your Neighbor’s Tea Party Rally commented on May 04

    […] News Sources wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptTea Party The Tea Party movement has been spared my ridicule thus far…Until now. I caught a Fox News town hall-esque State of the Tea Party program hosted by Glenn Beck this weekend and my abdominal muscles ached from all the cringing this broadcast induced. This was a nationally-televised moron-a-thon in the round. Its not that I am completely divorced from some of the views espoused by the nascent Tea Party phenomenon. Rather, its the embarrassment I feel for 95% of the part […]

  3. Things To Do Instead Of Attending Your Neighbor’s Tea Party Rally commented on May 04

    […] News Sources wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptTea Party The Tea Party movement has been spared my ridicule thus far…Until now. I caught a Fox News town hall-esque State of the Tea Party program hosted by Glenn Beck this weekend and my abdominal muscles ached from all the cringing this broadcast induced. This was a nationally-televised moron-a-thon in the round. Its not that I am completely divorced from some of the views espoused by the nascent Tea Party phenomenon. Rather, its the embarrassment I feel for 95% of the part […]

  4. video transitions black screen commented on Sep 15

    … [Trackback]

    […] Find More Information here to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  5. w88 commented on Sep 20

    … [Trackback]

    […] Info to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  6. 918kiss commented on Sep 28

    … [Trackback]

    […] There you can find 26637 additional Info to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  7. Joe Manausa commented on Oct 20

    … [Trackback]

    […] Find More on that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  8. 메이저사이트 commented on Oct 31

    … [Trackback]

    […] Info to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  9. RPA in Software Testing commented on Nov 12

    … [Trackback]

    […] Read More on to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  10. easyweb login commented on Nov 26

    … [Trackback]

    […] Information to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  11. benefits of intelligent automation commented on Nov 27

    … [Trackback]

    […] Find More to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  12. wigs for men commented on Nov 28

    … [Trackback]

    […] Read More on to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  13. concrete depot commented on Dec 12

    … [Trackback]

    […] Find More here to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  14. diamond painting kits commented on Dec 17

    … [Trackback]

    […] Read More on that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]

  15. Sexy commented on Dec 28

    … [Trackback]

    […] Read More to that Topic: thereformedbroker.com/2009/05/04/things-to-do-instead-of-attending-your-neighbors-tea-party-rally/ […]